1. February 2012 by admin.

As a video biographer, I have had two near-death situations which I’m going to share.

The first happened many years ago when I was commissioned to do a video biography of a retired US Navy ship captain.  With all the work we did on the project, it took about three months to complete. He got to see the preliminary version, but passed away before the final version was delivered. I cannot tell you how excited the family was to get this video. It was probably some of his last words and definitely the last time any of them would hear these stories from him.

The second situation was far more recent. Just last month, I was approached by a woman who wanted me to do a video biography of her husband. She said he had a very exciting past and very interesting stories his family would love to have. The project was delayed in getting started for one reason or another until a more convenient time could be found.  As I passed through the memorial line at his funeral, his widow told me how sorry she was she had delayed and now his stories would be gone forever.

I know in the real world, the idea of doing a video biography is not high on most peoples’ to-do list - until it’s too late. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve heard from people that I’ve met: “I wish I had done this for my parents”. No matter how much money you have, there is no getting back these stories.

The old saying, “a day late and a dollar short”, unfortunately doesn’t work here. There is no getting back tomorrow. I fully understand the pressures we have put on ourselves to get so many things done in a day. Unlike an audio or a written biography, a video biography takes only about two days, at the most, to get the footage shot. Realistically, the project may take much longer to complete, but once the footage is captured, the rest is just editing and research. There is normally no further interaction with the subject or subjects until completion. 

So the question has to be - “do I give up a couple of days to sit and answer some questions from an interviewer”? Very often, the children will want to preserve the stories of their parents for their children and grandchildren, but financial pressures sometimes delay the moving ahead with doing these biographies. No matter what the financial pressures may be, the clock on the wall, for each of us, continues to tick. The older we get, it seems, the louder the tick.

I cannot guarantee, down the road, you’re not going to regret buying that new 3-D television set that’s on sale right now or the deal you might get on a new car.  But I can guarantee this - the regret you’re going to feel if your parents’ stories are lost forever.

I am a parent, a grandparent and of course, a child. My parents have both passed away. My father, when I was young, my mother just about 10 years ago. My mother’s stories of her growing up with her siblings and her adventures during the war and her trials and tribulations of being a single parent are all gone. I have to be counted as one of those who will always regret not having her stories, in her words, to tell my children or my grandchildren.

So basically, you have two options. The first is to do nothing, take your chances that someday you’ll get to these stories and you won’t feel the regret that I and many others feel, knowing that these life stories, the treasures of your history, are gone forever. The second option is to call. We here at Personal Memoir Films feel strongly that no story should go untold. We will do our best to work within your budget, to make sure that these life stories are preserved for future generations to enjoy.

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1. January 2012 by admin.

This is my first blog and I’m hoping and planning that each month I will have a new one on a different topic. This topic is about dying or maybe better said - living. I hope you read it and the others that follow, finding them interesting and worthwhile. Your comments would be most appreciated either way.

We are all well aware that we are going to die. That is the basic reality of each of our lives. Yet from a psychological point of view we are still unwilling to accept this inevitability. While most of us say they are not afraid of dying, I think most of us are. Personally, at my age, I can see the clock ticking away. I hope I have many years to enjoy all the things that I have done in my life and the challenges that I have yet to face. I take into consideration the ages of my parents and relatives when they passed, do the simple math and calculate the number of years that I have left.

There are a number of things that make me feel old. Seeing grandchildren finishing high school and college and coming to the realization that my children are now in their 40s. It doesn’t seem that long ago that I was in my 40s so how can it be that I have children in their 40s already. I now have a granddaughter who has just turned 21, and may soon be starting a family of her own. That could make me a great-grandfather! Yuck! I remember my great-grandmother, who was in her 90s, as a frail, bent over, gray-haired woman. At my age, I still feel somewhat vibrant and in good health and I am expecting, barring any unforeseen circumstances, a good 20 or 30 years more.

So what do I have to be afraid of? I’ve led a good life, done many things, including traveling and seeing a lot of this country and the world. I don’t think my life, compared to others, has been that unique. So I can say with a great deal of honesty that I have led, I think, a full and interesting life and that meeting my maker should not be a major disappointment. But at the same time, like most of us, I’m not ready to knock on that door; in fact, I’m more likely to go kicking and screaming all the way.

So what does this all have to do with what I’m calling The Mortality Affect? I firmly believe that I am capable of extending my life force well beyond my physical being. I am defining my life force as the essence of who I am. A way I can extend this life force is to share who I am with the generations who literally do not know me. Sharing of one’s life with those yet to come is the best way to prolong who you are. The telling of your life stories on video lets those who are yet to come hear our voice, see into our eyes, hear our laughter, see our smile and hear the wisdom of our existence.

When I meet people and tell them what I do, almost universally they tell me what a great idea this is. And when I suggest they tell their life stories, there seems to be a reluctance to do so. Now could it be that some people feel their stories would be of no interest to those following or the reminiscing of our past may not be all that pleasant and we do not want to share those unhappy times with the future? While all this may be true, I believe that telling your life stories seems to make the clock on the wall really apparent. In other words, it’s their mortality that comes to the forefront. But I look at it as a way to extend my life.

Someone asked me if I could name my eight great-grandparents. Even though, as I said earlier, I remember a great-grandmother, I don’t remember her name. And there’s no one left in my family who would know. So here I am, faced with the same reality as my great-grandmother. Someday I will be someone’s great-grandfather and they will have no idea who I am. I could be totally forgotten. I will then, at that point, be truly dead! But if I ensure that my legacy is passed down to them, I will continue to live. 

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12. May 2011 by admin.

Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

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